For all I scream and shout, write, draw, create, nudge, urge, educate, beg and plead, I am still helpless. Because what does any of this matter if I am powerless to help those closest to me?
I have two sisters, sisters, who are pregnant and due within just 3 weeks of each other. First baby for each of them. Sister A and sister H. Sister A has been told by her OB that if her baby weighs more than six (SIX!) pounds, she'll "need" a section. Really? Six pounds? Yes, she's short. All of the women in my family are short. Our mother is just 5'1'' and gave birth to seven children who all weighed right around seven pounds. One of our youngest sisters gave birth at just 14 years old to an almost 8 lb baby.
This section will be SO hard on A, too. She doesn't want it. She doesn't even agree with her doctor that it would be necessary if the baby was over six pounds. This is the only ob/gyn she's ever seen though and she's not comfortable changing care providers. Her plan is to go to the hospital and refuse a section. That's exactly what she'll do, too. She'll go into labor completely on her own. She'll labor at home for as long as she feels is necessary, then she'll go to the hospital and say "I don't want a c-section. I'm fine and my baby is fine." Then her (s)care provider will bully my sister. She'll say she's a bad mother. She'll say she's going to kill her baby. She'll say her body can't handle a baby "that big". Then, A will consent to the section because she doesn't want to be a bad mother and she'll cry as they wheel her into the operating room and strap her to the steel table and cut her baby out. Then A will look at this small, perfectly capable of being pushed out, baby and think, "I could have pushed her out. I wanted to push her out."
And I'll be standing right there. Helpless. I know that look on her face. It says, "why didn't you tell me I could do this? Why did you let this happen to me?"
But I can't help her. She won't hear my words. I can't save my sister from the knife. MY. SISTER. She won't listen. I'm a fraud. She won't hear my words. I can't save my sister from the knife.